Dear Janay Palmer Rice, I’m not an NFL wife, but from 1999-2007, I was abused by my husband, a charismatic man with a lot of friends who bordered on fans. Today is the seventh anniversary of my divorce. I totally understand that the last thing you want right now is to be the centerpiece of […]
read more
On Valentine’s Day, I walked in the College Brides Walk to raise awareness about domestic and dating violence and to commemorate the life and death of Gladys Ricart, who was murdered on her wedding day by an ex-boyfriend. That’s me dressed in white in the middle of the picture (Mr. Z said he didn’t know I […]
read more
You probably know the story: Dylan Farrow’s open letter to Woody Allen. Woody Allen’s op-ed response. When I read Dylan Farrow’s letter, I was sure that she was telling the truth. I’ve heard enough victims of child sexual abuse write about the pain of their experience and the aftermath on IRL that I am familiar with survivors’ shame, reticence, and […]
read more
I repeat the mantra “lifeisshort lifeisshort lifeisshort.” Sometimes I add “getbusy hurryup domore lifeisshort ticktock.” I check an online calculator again—254 days until my 50th birthday. Lifeisshort, I chant as I rush from my office to the Women of Tomorrow event before heading back to the office again. I talk with a group of high […]
read more
I know two women who left their abusive husbands over this New Year’s mid-week holiday. As soon as the new apartments were ready, while the men were at work, with careful planning and the help of friends and family, they shed possessions and made a break for it. The moment of leaving an abusive […]
read more
Things get weird pretty quickly when your search term on a stock photo site is “feminist.” Women with ropes, women with boxing gloves, women with their stiletto’d feet on the throats of men. Try it and see. Here’s a strange one. What does it mean? To me the word has meant something simple and basic: […]
read more
Many years ago, I waited outside my home while the police searched for my then-husband, who was threatening to kill me and himself. A young policeman leaned into my car window and said, “Ma’am, get out while you can. These guys never change.” I didn’t […]
read more
Where does one begin to write about what happened in Boston yesterday? Should I even try? Maybe it’s better to stay silent. This morning I read this post by Caitlin at Fit and Feminist and this one by Susan Orlean at the New Yorker. Yes, of course. I know this. The only way for me to […]
read more
I met Alana Sheeren via my friend Jeanne, that great connector, and for the past couple of years I’ve followed Alana on her blog and social media. She’s doing a series of interviews called “Transformation Talk.” Here’s what she writes about them: Every Thursday for a year, starting in September 2012, I’ll post an interview […]
read more
This morning I happened to be reading Deborah Tannen’s Talking from 9 to 5, the chapter on women bosses. Tannen critiques a Newsweek review of Margaret Thatcher’s memoir for its handbag image: “The image of Thatcher ‘clobbering them with her metaphorical handbag’ undercuts the force of her actions, even as it gives her credit for […]
read more